Connection Beyond the Car Line

This is my Brooklyn Bo. She’s fun, she’s smart, and she’s the youngest of my three girls.

I recently shared with my dad that picking up Brooklyn from preschool is the highlight of my whole day.

It’s something about her hug, I told him. She smiles so big and runs straight to me, leaving her schoolmates and teachers in the dust.

Every day when I pick her up, I can feel my whole physiology shift. It feels like magic running through my veins. I have no doubt that there is a visible difference in my complexion before-and-after my 4pm Brooklyn hug.

That got me thinking… why don’t I feel that way at school pick-up with my two older daughters?

I love them just as much. Heck, I’ve loved them for way longer!

That’s when it hit me.

I don’t hug them at pick-up.

After all, it’s a parent pick-up line. So, I don’t even get out of the car! It’s like a drive-thru for kids to tuck-n-roll, stopping only long enough for them to get in safely while simultaneously not holding up the long line of cars behind us.

I decided to put my mama bear hug theory to the test.

The next day, in the middle of the parent pick-up line, I put it in park and stood outside of the car, waiting for my two big girls to come down the stairs.

My oldest came down first. When she looked up and saw me standing there, she smiled so big and picked up her pace to come in for a hug.

Ah. There it is, I thought. The magic that comes from hugging my baby girl, even when the baby is the oldest.

Next came my middle daughter. She looked confused, but still smiling big, she wrapped her arms around me and asked why I was outside of the car.

I just wanted to hug you, I said. And the sparks did their thing, yet again.

Isn’t it funny how we don’t realize what we’re missing? The opportunity is there every single day to shift my own energy… and maybe my kids’ too.

But unless I seek out the opportunity, or get out of the car in this case, I miss it.

But it is always there.

On my way home that day, I realized how often we do the same thing in our work.

We move through our days efficiently. We stay in the car. We keep the line moving. We send the email. We mail the appeal. We check the box.

And none of that is wrong.

But efficiency is not the same thing as connection.

So, I’ll ask you this: what is the equivalent of a hug in your organization?

• Is it a personal note?

• A phone call with no strings attached?

• An email with a photo letting them see the impact they made?

• A meetup for coffee to “catch up” without an angle?

What will light you up? And in turn, light up your donors?

The opportunity for deeper connection is already there… three times a day, or more, even.

But it requires intention. It requires presence.

And sometimes, it requires getting out of the car and slowing the line just a little.

Because connection changes physiology.

And in fundraising, connection changes everything.

Creating opportunities for connection is the kind of work we do at Jenni Craig & Co. If your organization is doing all the “right” things but still feels like it’s stuck in the car line, we’d love to help you step out, slow down, and build relationships that truly move the needle.